From Manhattan Hustle to Florentine Fairytale: The Unexpected Reality of an Expat Life
Kacie Rose Burns, an Australian influencer and former professional dancer, once pictured her move to the picturesque city of Florence, Italy, with her fiancé Dario, as a scene straight out of a fairytale. Trading the relentless pace of New York City for the charm of Tuscany in 2021, she envisioned a life filled with abundant pasta, fine wine, breathtaking architecture, and most importantly, a much-needed respite from her decade-long Manhattan grind. However, the reality of life in Italy proved to be a far cry from the romanticised ideal she had anticipated. The adjustment to the famously relaxed Italian lifestyle presented a series of unexpected and significant challenges, leaving her feeling profoundly lonely and isolated.
Burns, 32, candidly shared the stark realities of her transatlantic relocation with the Daily Mail, admitting to experiencing intense culture shock. She recounted struggles with seemingly mundane tasks, such as purchasing groceries or finding a birthday card for Dario, highlighting the vast differences in day-to-day life that had never crossed her mind. “The biggest surprises were the things you’d never think to Google or ask beforehand,” she explained.
One particularly illuminating incident involved a simple quest for a birthday card. In the US, pharmacies often function as mini convenience stores, stocking a wide array of items. Expecting a similar setup, Burns walked into a local pharmacy, searching the aisles for a card before eventually asking the pharmacist. The pharmacist’s bewildered reaction underscored the cultural disconnect. Burns later discovered that birthday cards are typically sold at a cartoleria, or stationery shop. This seemingly minor event perfectly encapsulated the jarring realisation that everyday norms in one country simply don’t translate to another.
Her maiden solo trip to the grocery store also proved to be a steep learning curve. After filling her basket with produce, she approached the cashier only to find she was expected to weigh the fruits and vegetables herself and print the price stickers. Unfamiliar with this system, she had to sheepishly return to the produce section, feeling a profound sense of being out of her depth.
Burns’ journey to Italy began in 2018 during a solo trip. It was during this visit that she not only fell in love with the country but also with Dario, a Florentine local. Their serendipitous meeting while she was exploring the city led to three magical days together. They maintained contact after her return to New York, eventually embarking on a long-distance relationship. A year later, Dario moved to New York on a one-year visa, and they spent the entirety of 2020 living together.
The onset of COVID-19 brought her performing arts career to a standstill. This forced hiatus from a career she had dedicated years to pursuing prompted a significant reevaluation of her life and aspirations. The period of uncertainty and introspection led her to reflect on the happiness she experienced during her 2018 trip to Italy. This nostalgia, coupled with a desire for a more fulfilling path, inspired her to enrol in an Italian language program in January 2021. She obtained a study visa and made the move to Florence with Dario.
Upon arrival, Burns found the transition to be immensely challenging. “No matter how excited you are, moving to another country means starting over in a place with a different language, culture, traditions and social norms,” she stated. While she was fortunate to have a support system through Dario and his family, the sheer unknown of navigating a new way of life was daunting. She had to essentially relearn how to function in daily life, a process that proved to be intimidating, even with the comfort of familiar faces.
The allure of a slower pace of life, which initially drew her to Italy, became her most significant adjustment. “Coming from New York City’s fast-paced hustle culture, learning how to slow down and appreciate life has been a major shift,” she commented. She observed a distinct cultural difference: American culture often prioritises individual achievement and success, whereas Italian culture tends to place a greater emphasis on community, family, and the enjoyment of everyday moments. “Italians have a remarkable ability to embrace life fully. There’s a stronger sense that life isn’t something to constantly optimise, it’s something to experience,” she noted.
Even with Dario’s support, Burns confessed to feeling “incredibly lonely, isolating and frustrating.” She described feeling “stupid a lot” and akin to being “five years old again” as she navigated unfamiliar territory and relearned basic life skills. The language barrier proved to be a formidable obstacle. Despite her language lessons, she often felt misunderstood, explaining that the nuances, humour, slang, and personality inherent in a native tongue are inaccessible when one is not fluent, leading to feelings of limitation.
Furthermore, her ingrained independence was challenged by the necessity of relying on others for help with tasks that were once effortless. Over time, however, she came to understand that accepting assistance was not a sign of weakness but an opportunity to learn vulnerability and the value of community, a trait she admires deeply in Italian culture.
Despite the initial hardships, Burns highlights the profound sense of community she has gained as the most rewarding aspect of her experience. Naturally, the exceptional food, stunning scenery, and, of course, the wine are also significant draws.
Having documented her experiences in a book titled You Deserve Good Gelato, Burns asserts that she has no regrets about her move. “I’m happy, but that doesn’t mean it hasn’t come with challenges, because it certainly has. But challenges are part of life, no matter where you live,” she affirmed. She now considers Italy home, having built a life and a community there, and expresses genuine happiness with her decision.
For those contemplating a similar international move, Burns offers sage advice: “Be willing to put on your humility cap and accept that there will be things you need to relearn. Lean on other people for help, embrace the local culture, and stay open-minded.” She stresses the importance of managing expectations, acknowledging that the journey will inevitably involve moments of frustration, loneliness, and discomfort. However, she concludes optimistically that for those who are truly committed, it can be one of the most profoundly rewarding experiences of their lives.
